Last chance saloon, for my lovely natural brown with no grey bits hair, honest!!

Well my final chance at finding anything to colour my hair without turning my head into a mass of puss weeping holes arrived today.

I found a non chemical based product that is not only organic, its also vegetarian, vegan, environmentally friendly and tree hugging.
It contains no ammonia, no peroxides, no PPDs and no Parebans.
For colouring it uses plant extracts it seems.

It is a bit more expensive than the standard hair dyes you bye in the shop but Hey Ho. If it works it will be money well spent.

I paid for quick delivery so I could have it before Christmas.
Basically I want it done before Christmas, but If it goes pear shaped so to speak at least I have a couple of weeks to do something before I go back work. (Like what shave my hair off ??)

Apparently it lasts for 6 - 8 weeks which will be fine for me.

I have chosen a dark brown as that's my hair colour. I really just want to hide the grey.

I need your prayers tonight as I think this is last chance saloon for hair coloring!!!
So here we go.

Our Father who art in Heaven, ......

xx

Damn allergic reaction to the mild hair dye.

Damn, I woke up this morning and felt wet behind me ear.

It seems I have had an allergic reaction even to this hair dye that has most things taken out
It does not contain Ammonia, Resorcinol, Nonoxynol, Parebens or any heavy metals ( I honestly don't know what they all are but they don't sound to good) but I still had a reaction.It does say it contains low levels of PPDs whatever they are. So maybe that is the bit I am having a problem with.

The stuff I tried was from a company called Spirit of Nature. They distribute lots of environmentally friendly products.

They do have within there range a product called "Logona Pure Herbal colour which is a semi permanent colour.
It contains no parebens, PPDs, Ammonia or peroxide. I may give this one a try as it is made from 100% natural ingredients.

Just by chance if anyone has tried this or has any suggestions on an alternative I would be very interested.

I took my Daughter with me to the hairdressers today. She is a real angel and always makes me laugh.
She is 6 years old and has 5 boyfriends on the go apparently! She is a real character.
I asked my hairdresser if he knew of any hair dyes that were kind to sensitive skin and he said I maybe should try some of the mousses that are available which while not dying the hair, can help hide some of the grey.
At the moment my hair is 90% brown and its just the 10% grey I want to colour really.

After getting home, we took the dog for a walk, played the guitar for an hour and then went for a run.

We have just finished an Indian takeaway and my plan for tonight is to cuddle up on the settee with my wife, a large glass of wine in hand and watch a DVD.

Have a great weekend everyone.
x

Christmas,Computer and hair

Well it has been a week and a half since my last blog so I better just do a quick catch up I guess.

I have had computer problems for the last few weeks. I have finally managed to get it up and running after a lot of effort and playing around.
I don't want to bore anyone with the details but basically I changed the hard drive and the mother board.
The damn thing would not then boot up.
This meant the only way to start it was to reload windows and delete everything on my hard drive.
Obviously that would have been a real pain.
So I then bought another new hard drive and loaded windows onto that.
I have now added the old one as a slave drive.
At least I have now kept all the information.
If nothing else it has been a learning experience!
Thanks to Chrissie and some other friends for there help and advise.

I have managed to spend a bit of time practicing the guitar which I have enjoyed.

I am off tomorrow to get my haircut. Hopefully it is about long enough to have a "BOB" style cut. I just have to be careful that I can style it in a masculine way (URGH I am going to vomit!) in the day.

I also ordered some natural hair dye which arrived today. Unfortunately I seem to have major reactions to most hair dyes.
I have done a test patch several hours ago and will wait until tomorrow to see if I have a reaction.
My grey hairs are now starting to show a bit and I really want to get rid of them. Fingers crossed.

I have kept up the jogging and managed to have a 3 mile run every couple of days. It has helped me loose 2 lbs of the lbs. I put on. Still 4 more to go.

I am on a reasonably even keel at the moment. I think its the thought of Christmas and a break that's helping.

I went shopping with my wife last Saturday and we managed to get most of the presents.
I bought my wife some charms that she wanted for her bracelet. It is so lovely and she knows I really want a bracelet like that.
Its the type where you buy the silver chain and then add the charms over time. You can personalize them and there are hundreds of options for the charms.
So when she asked me what I wanted I smiled and she knew what to get me. So we went and chose the bracelet and some charms to go on it.
Now I cant wait until Christmas morning. :-)

I love shopping with my wife. We have a good browse around and always make time for a pub lunch. Either my parents or hers babysit so it is a relaxed day.
We normally go 2 or 3 times a year.

My Mum called me the other night and she has been asking me what I wanted for Christmas. I have been racking my brains and really wanted some perfume.
She said " come on tell me what you want. You need to make up your mind time is running out. How about a CD or some after shave"

After shave !!! I laughed when she said it.

I said "no mum, Definitely not, but there is a nice perfume I am after if you wouldn't mind."
There was a short pause and then a "on that's fine and which one would you like"
So I told her and the conversation moved on.
I am trying to introduce things slowly with my parents and it does seem to be working. They are great. Although they never instigate any conversation on my Gender, they are ok if I bring it up.
We have a way to go yet but basically so far so good.

Oh dear, I have just looked at my arm and I need to epilate. That's tomorrow morning sorted!

xx

A good night learning the guitar

I am really starting to enjoy playing the guitar again.
I always love it when I am on an even keel.
I am planning along with John (the old guy that teaches me) to do another Gig at my house.
The first one was called "The big Gig". This one is going to be called the "The Big Gig 2"

We had my Mum and Dad, Sister and her husband, Next door neighbors, mother in law and Brother in law last time. My kids also had a couple of people stay over.
I think we had 22 in total with13 people staying over!
They were everywhere, in the conservatory, Dining room and all the bedrooms. :-D

We have planned 13 songs to perform this time.
Last time which was my first performance in front of anyone. We chose a set that was achievable for a new player. I played chords for a couple of songs but mostly I played lead.
This time I want to play mainly Chords to enable me to learn to play on my own.
I am also keen to learn to play at least 2 songs on my own for that night.
I have been on to U Tube and have found one of my Dads favorite songs "Hurt" the cover version by Johnny Cash.
I also managed to find a lesson on line on how to play it.
I have managed to practice for 1 hour on this song and 2 hours on the rest tonight.
It’s put a big smile on my face!
It’s a long way from good enough but I know I can do it now.

Last time I dedicated a song we played to my wife. It was "Wonderful tonight" by Eric Clapton.
She was in tears when I played and sang it. Lauren from next door also had tears in her eyes!
I have to think of a special song to dedicate for her this time.
I also need one to dedicate to my Mum.
Suggestions welcome!

I love the guitar and hope I can keep away from the downers that drag me away from it.

I know many of my on line friends are excellent players, yes I am talking about you Deja, Lori, Nicky and Teri.
Maybe we should start a band!
x

Oh Dear, the wrong glasses for work !!!

I made a bit of a mistake this morning that I didn’t realise until my secretary said “are those new glasses!”
I got up as normal in my girly night top and put on my women’s glasses, as I do every morning. After getting my slippers on and dressing robe, I went downstairs and woke the kids up.
We had breakfast, and then I washed, and blow dried my hair ready for work.
Now as I am not out at work, I always style my hair in a masculine way by brushing it back, which looks ok despite the fact it is now cut in the style of a small bob.
After blow drying my hair I always get dressed, change my glasses and leave the house.
But not today.
I had forgotten to get my male glasses on.
Now both pairs of glasses are fashion types and are in fact identical except the colour.
My male ones are Black and my female ones are a purple/red colour.
I drove to work, walked into the office and said good morning.
Jane looked at me strangely and said “are those new glasses.”
Now at first I went blank and didn’t know what she meant and on turning around to get something out of my bag, it dawned on me what I had done.
I was in disbelief at first and wracked my brains to think of an excuse.
On turning around to face her I explained that my daughter was playing with our new puppy and had accidentally knocked my glasses off. I went on to tell them at spec savers (who always have 2 for 1 offer) had the usual deal on and that my wife and 2 girls chose them for me.
I said the reason that they hadn’t seen me wear them before was that basically I didn’t wear them, but had no other choice.
I told them to enjoy it for 1 day as my others were being repaired today after which it would be business as usual.
Inside after the initial panic dyed off I was trying to hold back the laughter.
There were a few jokes made about them, but it wasn’t too bad actually. I obviously kept a low profile all day!
Goodness knows if it has put any ideas in their heads but certainly it didn’t seem that way.
I called my wife on the way home and we had a laugh about it. My daughters were also chuckling away.
After dinner I went to see my youngest daughter in the nativity play. She was an innkeeper. There was lots of singing and laughing. She and all her friends were fantastic.
I hope if I do transition I am not forced to avoid occasions like that. It would be a terrible loss.
Hope all my friends are well and that your Christmas preparations are going to plan.
x

Self acceptance

Self acceptance is the first stage of transition.
I have heard this said many times and it is something that in the main I do.
I accept myself now for who I am.
I never used to, I tried to fight it, deny it, run away from it forget it. But it was never going to work.
So learn to accept it I did and now I do accept who I am.
But I have to admit the thing I find difficult is when I think of what impact this will have on others.
Recently almost every time I go out in a social setting I sit there and try to imagine what my relationships will be like with whoever I happen to be with, If and when I transition. I struggle to stay in the here and now and my mind races away wondering if we will still be friends. If we are able to, how will the friendship change?
I imagine if the way we interact will change and hope that they will truly see me as a woman. I hope they will still feel comfortable to talk to me and have fun in the way we do now.
Will I be more confident and how will I change?
Will I lose everyone I love and hold close.
But I also think how the relationship my wife and kids have with these people. How will that change. Will they lose friends? Will they become in some small way outcasts.
My son at the grand old age of 11 and in his first year of senior school now has a girlfriend who has lasted more than 2 weeks! I even find myself now wondering how this may affect relationships my children have with others. If it did affect them, would they resent me as the cause?
So this then causes me to feel resentment at myself again. To try to fight it and hide it. To not accept myself for what it may do to others.
It won’t resolve itself I know. I need to do something to find a way through the terrible ups and downs I have.
x

Why men shouldnt write advice columns

I recieved this today and it did make me laugh.

Not PC but still funny!

x